the dream of some horrible shit

Dear brain why did you think it was a good idea to dream I was sharing a bed with John K. Uuugggghhhhh. The part where he was confessing his evil past and trying to drug me with big needles was not good either, even if I did get to have my hands around his throat and end up jamming those needles through his hand and into his face. Repeatedly. Which was both really horrible and kind of good.

The second part of the dream was no better. Okay the part about flying a nimble little X-Wing-ish craft out of the reach of some “T-wings” that had an attack involving trying to crush me with huge metal plate wings was kind of fun. But. After some other stuff I was running across a yard from an assassin, who had previously demonstrated his weapon: a small thrown object designed to look like some kind of clockwork hummingbird, with razor wings. He casually threw it as me. I batted it out of the air and felt my left hand get a little sliced; I then fell to the grass as he started to explain how he had anticipated how I’d react to that first attack, and… I lost the rest of it, only noting something about the blades being poisoned, as I tried to crush its body, only to watch it shift and blur into some kind of horrible hybrid of plant leaves with markings that looked like a squirrel, which started running at me… and then I lurched to the right and woke right the fuck up with “oh so that’s what an avern looks like” bouncing through my head.

I have nightmares where I get killed by weird alien plant weapons out of The Book Of The New Sun. 10/10 for style, brain, but negative six hundred for a dream where I had to literally yank myself away from the brink of death. None like that ever again please brain.

I need to pee.

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